loads of randomness...

1. I graded the entire stack of papers! The same night I collected them! And all the others too!! Everything is graded!! (until tomorrow morning) :)

2. Also, I am meeting with the realtor tomorrow, to discuss the possibility of buying. Buying in Chicago terrifies me, but I'm researching.

3. Also, I got an invitation to see Lucy Calkins in person in February. Super cool. Hope my principal lets me go.

4. I am starting a new reflection book: The courage to teach. (Parker Palmer)
I hope it will lend some clarity to my decision making process... reflection to follow.

5. an excellent time with friends over the holidays-- a few pictures to celebrate:

*** with Sarah *** Nicole and I enjoying hot chocolate *** my first ever Bears game, with Blaine *** and some quality time with Miri (the baby is walking!) ***









Tee-hee. I'm off to bed.

Good Science!

Using cabbage water to test for bases and acids-- look how well it works!! I soaked cabbage in water over night (beware-- it stinks!). We filled the bottom of dixie cups with various clear or clear-ish liquids (lemon juice, ammonia, bleach, windex, etc.), and poured the cabbage water straight into the cups. Check it out!!

My environment...

In an effort to bring you a little more into my world, I thought I'd give you a visual tour of my classroom... the heart of me. Here it is at the beginning of the year, empty and waiting.



And a little later... the same view.



The library checkout system...




And my desk area.



There it is! My second home, as it is. Hope you enjoyed!

Before I get to work...

I feel like I have six hundred and thirty six things to get done today. Normally, it doesn't bother me, but this particular weekend, working my second job is not meshing with me as a teacher. I don't want to work. I want to cuddle on the couch and watch movies. I want to take endless walks in the crisp air. I want to do absolutely nothing for a day.

It's not that I have to work. It's a choice, so in that way, I have no right to complain, but I feel tired, and so complain I will. But let's get to the root of the problem. I'm not tired because I waitress two days a week. I'm tired because of my "real job".

Honest point number one: I am much more content and much less frustrated now than I was at the beginning of the year.

Honest point number two: This is not really because anything is better. It's more because I am more capable of handling my frustration, better equipped to smile and nod at the people who need to be smiled and nodded at, and less focused on responding to each word or suggestion I receive.

Honest point number three: I am still not really that happy. Until this year, teaching has filled me with a joy that I didn't really know how to express. Somewhere this year, between the clashing directives, the push for numbers only, the lack of discipline, the missing support system, and the craziness of it all, something has come up missing. I've tried to find it, I have, but I don't think it will come back to me at this school.

Honest point number four: Now I have to make the hard decisions. Do I stay for another year in an environment that does not make me happy because I think it is probably better for me professionally, or do I make a break and leap into the unknown? I'm looking at making some big moves financially, so I need to have job security-- do I sacrifice, or trust?

I'm unsure. I'm struggling. I'll figure it out, eventually.
Time to work on the lesson plans.

I just yelled at my cat.

I know I shouldn't do that. She didn't mean to do anything wrong, it's just the counter looked so appealing, and I was there, and she wanted to be close to me and purr and shed fur all over my skirt, and she knew she could make the jump, so she did it. Now she's all skulking in the corner and refusing to come over even though I put on my nice owner voice and made smacking noises with my lips and snapped my fingers and promised to rub under her chin like she likes.

I want to make her understand. It's nothing personal, it's just that I had students, one particular, all day, who did things they weren't supposed to do because they were appealing, and I was there, and they just wanted my attention, and I held (most of) my calm all day and I didn't (really) raise my voice, and I came home and then...

I think I see why couples should avoid each other for the first hour after work or so.

My cat and I, we're kind of like a couple. Except she's a cat, and female, and I'm a human, and female. Any Heterosexual. I don't know about her sexuality, but I don't suppose it really matters...

As close as I'm gonna come for now, anyhow. *Sigh*